Xanga Heaven is no Haven

The sword of the religious warrior leaves a wide swath. The blog site: xanga, features an all-Christian blogging community that I refuse to market by mentioning, but it has the word "life" in it. One of my contentions is that xanga gets funding from public companies to run its engines. Are the company sponsors aware of the complete Christian domination and if they are aware--why so discriminatory with their funds? Also--wouldn't it be more appropriate for a public and publicly funded site to showcase all major religions,and the scientific community? Why isn't their a "life science" blogging community showcased or the "secular reasoning" section for people with inquiring minds instead of the blind leading the blind?
Stay tuned. I may decide to stop playing in xangaland. Although it is much more fun being the voice of reason in a sea of fumbling sheep. Checkout xanga. If you like its format, stay, but please be a presence of enlightenment and reason.
Plead for the needy! The needy scientifically minded, the needy woman, the needy man, the needy society that craves freedom!

Studs

Fraternize without Facebook?

"Importance" in a squirrel colony generally refers to "adult males that are putting out feelers for sex opportunities or...adult females that are experienced at mating and want to have their choice of a bunch of males,". (Discovery.com)

Male squirrel: "Hey, baby how you doin'? Wanna see my nuts?"

Female: "Sure, feel my bush....y tail?"

Happy Spring!

Drilling a Tight Hole

While it may feel good in the short term, is there any future in it?

tight hole
1. n. [Drilling]
ID: 1625A section of a wellbore, usually openhole, where larger diameter components of the drillstring, such as drillpipe tool joints, drill collars, stabilizers, and the bit, may experience resistance when the driller attempts to pull them through these sections. See: openhole, tool joint
2. n. [Drilling]
ID: 1626A well that the operator requires be kept as secret as possible, especially the geologic information. Exploration wells, especially rank wildcats, are often designated as tight. Unfortunately, this designation is of questionable benefit in keeping the data secret. See: wildcat

I'm pro-capitalism and making money, but I also feel that corporations have a social and environmental responsibility. Sustainable and renewable resources are the wave of the future and many do not require the rape and pillage of the natural world and other nations.

Survivalism by Nine Inch Nails:

I should have listened to her

So hard to keep control

We kept on eating but

Our bloated belly's still not full

She gave us all she had but

We went and took some more

Can't seem to shut her legs

Our mother nature is a whore(chorus:)

I got my propagandaI got revisionism

I got my violence

In hi-def ultra-realism

All a part of this great nation

I got my fistI got my planI got survivalism

Hypnotic sound of sirens

Echoing through the street

The cocking of the rifles

The marching of the feet

You see your world on fire

Don't try to act surprised

We did just what you told us

Lost our faith along the way and found ourselves believing your lies(chorus)(cut-up speech)All bruised and broken, bleeding

She asked to take my handI turned, just keep on walking

But you'd do the same thing in the circumstance

I'm sure you'll understand(chorus)You got your pacifism - I got survivalism (repeat)

Texas Tea

Come and listen to a story about a man named GW Bush

A poor mountaineer, with an alcoholic blush,

Then one day he was shootin at some food,

And up through the ground came a bubblin crude.

Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea.

Well the first thing you know ol GW's a millionaire, Kinfolk said "GW move away from there" Said "Iraqi is the place you ought to be"

So they loaded up the truck and moved to Iraqi.

Holes, that is. No swimmin pools, or movie stars.

Well now its time to say good bye to GW and all his kin.

And they would like to thank you folks fer kindly droppin in. You're all invited back a gain to this locality

To have a heapin helpin of their hospitality Hillybilly that is.

Set a spell, Take your shoes off. Y'all come back now, y'hear?

War Song

It is war! It is war!
O God’s angel, keep it awayand intervene to stop it!
Sadly, it is war—and I do not want it to be my fault!

What could I do if
the ghosts of the slaughtered came to me sorrowing in my sleep, bloody, white and pale, and wept before me—what?

If hearty men who went looking for honor,
Maimed and half dead,
Waltzed before me in the dust and cursed me
In their dying need?

If a thousand thousand fathers, mothers, brides,
So happy before the war,
Now all miserable, all poor people,
Cried out in grief over me?

If hunger, illness and dire need
Gathered friend, friend and enemy into the grave
And crowed to me about honorsitting on a corpse?

What help would crown and land and gold and honor be?
They could not make me happy!
Sadly, it is war—and I do not want it to be my fault!

--Matthias Claudius (1740-1815). This poem was written in 1779 about the War of Bavarian Succession.

Atrocities in Iraq

Reasons to end the imperialist dynasty as stated by the IVAW:

*Corporate profiteering is driving the war in Iraq

*The occupation is a primary motivation for the insurgency and global religious extremism

*Our national “moral authority” is being undermined


Staff Sgt. Jimmy Massey

Rape and murder of "Hadji girl"

My war

Why end strife when you can market and profit from it?

Personal stories

In the news

War is hell

Lobbies are too powerful," the most powerful being the ones wanting war. - Gunther Grass, Nobel Laureate

When Irish Eyes are Smilin'

There's probably a reason!

Every Sperm is Sacred

If you think I can be shrewish, you haven't met my catholic/Irish friend! My friend cusses like a trucker,has been known to bed down a few men in her day, and drinks like a fish. She would rant more than me (unbelievable I know) and scream like a banshee to get her way. She never set foot in a church outside of official functions like weddings etc. UNTIL---She met a tall,strapping marine (divorced btw) who happened to be catholic. They moved in together and engaged in quite the unmarried bliss--oddly without conceiving any children out of wedlock (birth control maybe?). Not only did her incessant screeching and temper tantrums subside after meeting him, she also became what I can only refer to as a born-again catholic. She attends church every Sunday, says grace before meals (the first time in 20+ years), and has charged full on into the catholic guilt phase ("I've always been a good christian girl"--she tells me one day when I was doing something questionable as usual).

She even believes that her fiance only has eyes for her and doesn't even look at other women. When I broached the subject that all men are visual and sexual beings and will always at least want to "see" many female forms, she chidingly told me that her man isn't like that and hasn't the least thought about other women! HA! I laughed at her and then shook my head.

So, anyway. I am embarking on a road trip to NV to celebrate her coming catholic nuptials by hitting all the casinos,partying,gambling, and drinking. I guess when you're catholic, everything goes as long as you say your sorry at the end of the day, say grace and go to church.

Presidential potential

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

LMAO! I did the test about 3x and still came out with JFK! I always thought of myself as more of a Marilyn! I should run for Prez!?

Networking Nativity?

"I am a follower of Jesus and it is my relationship with Him that motivates and informs all that I do."

This quote was the first line of an insurance sales lady's description on a prominent/international networking website. Seriously?

The most important aspect of you and your business is that you are a follower of Jesus?

Will He reduce my insurance rates?

Is He a good listener when I have an insurance claim?

How long will I have to wait while you consult Him on my coverage?

As your consumer, I don't know that I want to play second fiddle to your "relationship" with this guy.

Did He help you tie your shoes before He directed you to type your profile online?

Can you imagine how much business I wouldn't get if I stated that I'm an active agnostic (sounds like a tampon commercial--try today's active tampon for the agnostic on the run) who "believes" in scientific method and evolution? Christians don't hesitate to pull the "God" card in marketing and networking, but does it work so well for many other groups?

Pretentious Players

And their primates. When I first heard this headline: "Pet Lemur Bites 3-year-old boy", I thought "wow! How odd? How would a boy and lemur meet--the zoo?" Then my second thought was the exotic pet trade and I wasn't disappointed: Lemur story.

Leave it up to a professional athlete to use his mega paycheck to do something stupid. Jog my memory--when has something similar happened before? What possesses a parent to think one day "you know what will make an awesome pet for little Johnny?A quite possibly endangered primate with nasty pointy teeth. I'll take this wad of extra cash and flaunt my affluence by going down to the neighborhood Madagascar and purchase an exotic find!" *whistles* then *spits out tobacca*.

WTF? If you have some extra cash that you want to dispose of why don't you put efforts towards SAVING endangered species and EDUCATION?? I'm sure that pretty penny used to purchase poor Zoboomafoo would have done a lot better applied to his habitat and educating the world about the primate plight!

OR
at a minimum, buy me a new car or put MY kid through college.

(OK. Maybe I'm just jealous I don't have my own personal primate playmate. Shucks!)

The Black Stallion

Did I mention I like horses? Growing up, I rode my quarter horse bareback frequently and amassed a giant collection of Breyer horses. My mother still sends me Special edition Christmas Breyers every year (lucky me). Being artistic, I also doodled pictures of horses constantly and I even recently sketched a pony for my daughter (maybe I'll share if I can get it scanned and saved).

One of my favorite movies is The Black Stallion. Who wouldn't want to be stranded on a beautiful desert island with a magnificant stallion (and a horse too)? You could dine on sea food every evening,get a tan, workout by riding or trapsing through the sand,swim and frolick for hours. The only things I would add are the occasional Cabana boy sans garments and maybe a pina colada or two.

You like Pina Coladas

Getting caught in the rain

And the feel of the ocean

And the taste of champagne

If you'd like making love at midnight

In the dunes of the Cape

Come with me and escape

Different strokes

It has been awhile since I spouted about a feminist topic or anti-religion, so here it goes:

I think I met a woman from Pakistan yesterday. I'm not sure because her male companion spoke for her and she wouldn't look me in the eye. I complain ad nauseam about sexism in the U.S., but at least women aren't reduced to infant or chattel status here. I can look a man in the eye (sort of--I have to look up at times) and I can move about unchaparoned in easy fitting clothing. In some cultures and religions, it is as if they want women to be invisible: Do not speak,do not bare your skin, and do not do things unchaparoned because you are cursed with a vagina.

My dog, Muffin Top, ran up to her and licked her foot and she screamed in fright and horror!? I thought to myself, she obviously has never been licked by a man anywhere if she responds to a four-footed friend with such shreaks! This thought prompted me to do a brief google search on Muslims and sex. Surprise, surprise. In Egypt, they are debating whether or not to remove clothes for intercourse, denouncing oral sex as filthy, and asking for definitions of oral sex because pleasuring women is not high on their to-do list: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2006/jan/17/worlddispatch.egypt.

The plight of the Muslim female is woeful indeed!

"The Trial"

"The East receives my songs, some praise, some curse To each of them my gratitude I bear For I've avenged the blood of each slain woman and haven offered her who is in fear.

Woman's rebellious heart I have supported ready to pay the prize - content to die if love should slay me, for I am love's champion and if I ceased, then I would not be I."

Nizar Qabbani

I'm F**cking Anakin by Cowgirl

If Sarah Silverman is f**cking Mat Damon and Jimmy Kimmel is f**cking Ben Affleck, then

I'm f**cking Hayden Christensen!

I'm sorry but its true!

Way up high

With his Eiffel Tower (*nudge wink*)

With cash

Like the Romans do

While surfing in Fiji

In a British pub

While listening to the Fray

Someplace warm

In a Mercedes convertable SL550

That's right, we're f*$king from one spot to the next!

Lady or a Tramp?

Or Kitten or Cougar? These questions and more raced through my mind the other day at lunch. A charming, dashing, and 20-something waiter/bartender was very "friendly" and made sure that he met all my needs at the OG (Olive Garden). There was some obvious flirting going on--so much so that it prompted my lunch companion to joke that I should leave my business card as a calling card. Then the conversation turned to cougars and young men. I can't decide if "cougar" is a positive or negative term or if I even fit the category. I'm only in my 30's and I spend exactly 5 minutes total on my curly locks and makeup, I don't have fake tits, and I can't stand to be in heels for more than a few hours. My vision of a cougar has always been the overdone, 50ish, desperate housewife looking for some attention. But, when I broach the topic with my female friends--they seem to embrace the "sugar momma" connotation. Cougar, I've been informed, is a very hot older woman who is independent and doesn't need men for security--only for obvious uses! Look at Demi Moore, they tell me. She is very beautiful and successful--she is a cougar!
So the question still remains to me---What defines a cougar? At what age are you labeled and what criteria are needed? Are cougars hot or not? Check out the survey on the side.

Metamorphosis (again)

I enjoy blogging as a creative outlet and will continue to do so!
PS--I suppose I'm flattered that I was chosen as a target. I guess I must pose some sort of a threat for a group to single me out for a high school "jolly" fest!

Thanks for the good times,

Cowgirl

Drugstore Cowgirl

Today seems like a good day to burn a bridge or two

The one with old wood creaking that would burn away right on cue

I try to be not like that but some people really suck

Some people need to get the axing chalk it up to bad luck

I know a drugstore cowgirl so afraid of getting bored She's always running from something so many things ignored I might do that stuff if it didn't make me feel like shit I'm on some old reality tip so many trips in it

Beautiful disaster Flyin' down the street again I tried to keep up You wore me out and left me ate up Now I wish you all the luck

You're a butterfly in the wind without a care A pretty train crash to me and I can't care I do I don't whatever

I know a drugstore cowgirl so afraid of getting bored She's always running from something so many things ignored I try to be not like this but I thought it'd make a good song There's nothing to see shows over people just move along

Break Pigskin with Me

If there is one thing women can do (other than their sexual attributes) its cook some mean half-time meals for the big game (then maybe do some sewing and keep an emaculate house). You know, women are competitive that way!

I have the perfect pigs in a blanket recipe:

Ingredients: Little Smokies and Pillsbury croissants dough

Directions:

Cut the raw dough into little triangles with scissors

Wrap each smokie in a "croissant" triangle and bake according to Pillsbury directions!

Mmmmm.....Good.

Now that you have more free time---you too can sneak a peek at Tom Brady's "swollen"...er....."ankle"!

Animal Farm of Sorts

What a playground I found! Pranksters "hanging out" in the underworld.



I had a rep when I attempted to participate in the beauracratic and heavily entrenched with religion government system. People would smile in amusement and relief when they met me in person and found that I was petite, short and not brutish in appearance at all. I had a parent laugh lightly one time--"I thought you were a big monster of a woman, yet you are a soft-spoken, young-looking teacher (I really didn't embellish the "young-looking" part--I got accused of being a student frequently)!"



While I obviously have a wee bit o' a temper,being of a reasonable mind, I can usually see through my flashes of "PMS" (partly made up syndrome to explain away women's tendency to have independent thought and anger). I can appreciate the need for a creative outlet and freedom of expression. I would never wish someone to destroy their creativity--it would be like destroying a part of themselves.



Yours,











Cocquetish Cowgirl

Hacker-haters

Censorship is for Pussies

and panty-waists (in keeping with the sexist sport theme)! I've found myself in trouble on Mondays lately. Take last Monday for instance, I got pulled over for passing on a solid yellow line. As the dashing,young,and freshly showered Sheriff with the smart tie and button-up shirt shone his "light" in my face, I thought "I've been very bad officer". He was in a hurry that morning too, so I got off (from the ticket violation at least).
Well, then I broke the rules by combining militant feminazi ranting with a masturbatory (I think I made that up---cool huh?) image of a topless cheerleader on my post. This juxtaposition of the nude female form and abrasive verbiage is apparently very disturbing to men. Men like their women and their reading the same way--submissive and mellow. My bad!
My creative outlet has ruffled some feathers and I have been blocked and intimidated from participating in public forums (again). I can hear their battle cry "Light the animal carcasses on fire and load the Trebuchet---attack the firewall!"
Hacker-types crack my shit up. They preach about freedom of information and freedom from the bounds of censorship, yet they are the first to use their deity-like complex to stifle others who disagree. A hacker-type recently told me that what the hackers recently did to "Scientology" is CRIMINAL, but it is okay to mess with civilians? Hmmph! I also like how they hide behind avatar aliases like the "Joker". It is like a double disguise, not only is it not you, it is a thickly painted image so there is complete separation or so you think.

Every Game Needs a Man?

According to Gatorade's latest commercial "Every Game Needs a Hero" just in time for the Superbowl, the only female sport worth advertising is women's tennis. There are four sports represented: football,baseball, basketball, and tennis. Conspicuously missing: The WNBA, OLYMPIC WINNING women's softball, and women's soccer among others!? I could tell that if there was even one woman on their creative team, she was obviously dick-whipped. The 100% testosterone-driven, monosyllabic team of Jon, Doug, Ron, Steve, Rob, Bob, and Red felt it was vitally important to show male-dominated sport images at least 13x compared to the homogeneous image of the SAME woman in a tight skirt 4x!! Not only is it the same woman in every shot, but she is the quintessential sex symbol with long, flowing blond hair, cleavage baring tank top and tennis skirt. Where are Serina and Venis Williams--Are they inconveniently too black and powerful to be seen as sex objects and/or good athletes? After my daughter (with a fractured fibula) and I sat there and counted up the discrepancies in gender and race images, I advised her to change her sport. The only way female athletes will make money professionally in the United States is if they are shaking that T & A, posing for MAXIM half-clothed, or working the streets as a prostitute and they obviously won't be working for Gatorade's ad department!
Why doesn't Gatorade be a little more obvious with their point and just show random images of scantily clad cheerleaders bending over front and back view. Now THAT would sell some sports drink!
BTW---My daughter happens to love Gatorade and drinks it frequently, but I may consider switching to the generic electrolyte beverage---I'll save money and my fucking blood pressure! Gatorade doesn't need little sport girl funding for their brand, they apparently get plenty of income from big sweaty guys in tight pants (don't get me wrong--I like a big sweaty guy in tight pants as much as the next gal and sexual imagery has its place--just not on the playing field).
Gatorade should change their slogan to "Every Gatorade Ad Needs a Woman's Input" or the more appropriate: "Every Gatorade Exec can Kiss my Irish Ass!"