Thursday, November 1, 2007

A Halloween Tale

It was Halloween morning and since I have a newly enhanced love of strolling with my dogs, I decided to walk my costumed daughter to her bus stop. She was smartly attired with a matching purple scrub top and bottoms purchased from a real medical scrub supply store. She was even donning an authentic stethoscope! As we approached the bus stop, the boys exclaimed "it's a zombie nurse!" then one corrected the others with a wiley smile and yelled "No! I was talking about her mom!" The cutely pertinent boy was probably accurate because I had just rolled out of bed with disheveled hair and barely open eyeballs!

Then the girls at the stop started chattering about how they liked her nurse outfit and always wanted to be nurses. Well, little did these unsuspecting youth know: in addition to "errand girl", I also play the superhero role of "stereotypical awareness girl" although I wasn't dressed up that day. I immediately had to point out--why not Dr.? Why did you assume that she was a nurse? I brushed aside my tousled coif and then went on to elaborate in my feminine studies sort of way. I explained "If I were to pick a profession in the medical field, it would be Dr., they get paid more and do less of the "dirty" work". Being the capricious and easily influenced birds of teenage indecision, they immediately adopted my philosophy. They began to espouse the virtues of Dr.'s and how they had always considered becoming Dr.'s (keep in mind they were infatuated with female nurses mere minutes ago). This experience led me to recall how easy it is to influence fragile teenage egos (especially when you are of the same gender). Did I poison young minds or instil confidence and broaden their horizons? I fear I may have set a dangerous idea in a young hispanic girl's mind. I asked this young girl what she was going to be for Halloween and like many girls it isn't a matter of "what" as "how" feminine they are going to be. She proudly exclaimed that she was going to wear the purple dress that she got for a friend's Quinceañera. The pinnacle of a Spanish or Mexican girl life is the Quinceañera: "Quinceañera refers both to a special unique birthday and to the girl who has turned 15. The event is comparable to the concept to a debutante's "coming out party" in other countries. The celebration acknowledges that a young woman has reached maturity and is now ready to start a life beyond childhood. In addition, the celebration is intended to reaffirm religious faith, good morals, and the virtues of traditional family values "( I have mixed feelings about this practice. While it is nice to uphold customs and have cultural "coming of age" ceremonies, it is another example of a dominant religion taking native beliefs and twisting them into something different. The Quinceanera is the catholic churches attempt to consolidate the ancient Aztec practice and it is a message to young hispanic girls to look forward to their lives as mothers and wives. Many hispanic girls are simply encouraged to get pregnant and begin families without much in the way of other options: "1) Almost one-quarter of Hispanic women will give birth before age 20; 2) Hispanic teens tend to look at the prospect of pregnancy more favorably than teens from other racial and ethnic groups; and 3) Sexually experienced Hispanic teens are less likely to use contraception than teens in the overall U.S. population. In addition, the brief presents implications for policy and practice"

"Teen births - In 1995, Hispanic teen birth rates were the highest in the Nation, surpassing for the first time the non-Hispanic black rate, which had previously been the highest. Higher rates for Hispanics are primarily driven by the higher teen births among Mexican women"(

The question: To aspire be a Dr. or a young mom (or a slutty nurse/princess/cheerleader/fill-in-the-blank skirted girl? Which is the better for the woman and for society? Don't get me wrong, I'm obviously not an advocate for prudes. I have often pondered the nasty school girl or nurse costume, but as a fun role-playing option. Look at Addison Montgomery (fictitious character of Private Practice and Grey's Anatomy), she is an accomplished professional and extremely sexy and could be a mother? Is her character entirely fictitious?


Jimbo said...

My half sister had her Quinceanera last year. What a joke and a waste of money that is. Her dress was $800.00 and the party cost several thousands dollars. Poor families will spend every dollar or Paso they have to put on a Quinceanera for their daughters. What it really boils down to in the Mexican communities is my daughter is a women and she is ready to start making babies.

As for Addison, she is hot! I put her on my list of celebrity pass list a while back.

NotANiceGirl said...

I agree about Addison. She's really beautiful.

I don't get it. I think what I really don't get is that most of the dresses are fugly!

We made a bridal gown in pink for a girl's party. It was a 6500.00 dress to begin with. It looked like somebody dumped pepto on it! We also did a few socialite dresses for sweet 16 & debut abd these parents should really get off the crack. I get wanting to give your kids everything but when is it too much?

Eagle Eye said...

Right. I guess they aren't too concerned about saving to pay for "higher education" if they are going to be baby makin' machines! I had "A" biology students who told me that their only plans after high school were to find a husband and have kids. Again, not that being a mom is bad, but if you have talent and aspirations why can't you do both? With modern technology--the wash machine,microwave,dish washer to name a few, it doesn't necessarily take all day to clean or cook anymore! Plus if you have a nice career, you can often afford cleaning/babysitting help (depending on family size and occupation of course)!
Here's an idea. Take the $6500 you could pay for a one-time dress and use it to help pay for education, a house or a maid service for several months!

Eagle Eye said...

"Outcasts and girls with ambition
That's what I wanna see" (PINK)

NotANiceGirl said...

You're 100% right. The people buying these are in the right schools & in the right social standing. They remind me of the women who went to college to meet a man and then stayed home to have a family. I think it's great if you want to do that. Some women do & kick ass at it. There is nothing worse than a woman sitting home wishing it was different or just accepting it as if it's as good as it will get. Hell, man or woman- people should want more.

NotANiceGirl said...

And as far as a one time dress. These women buy dresses that cost over 15-20K and get divorced anyway and fast! It pisses me off. Just seeing the way people focus on the wedding but then don't work on the marriage. If you have the money or not- the focus is not right. AND I work in fashion. These people pay my bills!